dr_phil_physics: (Default)
dr_phil_physics ([personal profile] dr_phil_physics) wrote2006-08-05 02:40 am

You Didn't Ask For It, But...

In Commemoration of the End of Clarion 2006

In case you've wondered what a "crit" is -- or if you know and remember -- I give you Will Ludwigsen's Clarion Simulator.

(grin)

Dr. Phil

[identity profile] larcb.livejournal.com 2006-08-05 01:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks for a good morning laugh!
Larc
(Al's wife)

[identity profile] slithytove.livejournal.com 2006-08-05 02:58 pm (UTC)(link)
This drew me in right away. That said, too much of this story is happening off stage. undefined start out with a more interesting character. On the whole, though, thank you.

Clarion would have been so much better if we had just thrown a few uninitialized variables into our crits now and then.

[identity profile] dr-phil-physics.livejournal.com 2006-08-05 07:03 pm (UTC)(link)
I really loved the language. I felt, though, that too much is happening here. Be a lion and pick just one zebra. One small thing you might want to try: give the protagonist a more complicated motivation. On the whole, though, I really liked it.


One of the ones I thought I read last night mentioned the story starting on page 20... What's scary is the first three I read made perfect sense -- the fourth one contradicted itself. (Grin) Must've been the last of sleep...

Dr. Phil