Dr. Phil's Dreamwidth Journal

Just No

Dear J.C. Penney (or as you seem to want to call yourself now, jcp),

What the hell is up with this new TV ad campaign? You know, the ones with the people wailing and screaming and crying AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS WITH SUSTAINED HORRIFIC SOUNDS WHICH GO ON AND ON AND ON...

Good lord, we have to Mute the TV every damned time this is on. You think this is going to engender sympathy and/or interest in whatever your new venture is that launches tomorrow?

No.

It makes me desire for your new venture to fall flat on its face and be consumed by the hellish heat from a thousand burning suns going supernova simultaneously.

For a start.

So please, fire that ad agency. Maybe they will never work in television again.

Thank you.

Dr. Phil

... About TV Commercials

You know those commercials for the Off clip-on thingie for repelling insects? They came out last year or so, at least up here. But I don't know anybody who has actually used one. So I don't know if they work or whether they're so powerful or aromatic that they're worse than just slathering yourself in Cutters or DEET or whatever.



But...

The commercials make it look like those belt mounted personal shield generators they use in Dune. You know, project a hemisphere of shield protection. My problem with this? What if the mosquitoes are armed with knives and move in very slowly, so they can penetrate the shield? What good are those shields gonna do now?

See, this is why you need to be up on your genre literature. Because if you don't understand these SF/F references, why then you might make some terrible consumer choices. Unleash forces you don't want unleashed.

I'm just sayin'.

Dr. Phil

Sigh... Will It Never End?

First it was Christmas displays starting to be assembled in stores around Labor Day -- and yes that included dates in August. Then we had Christmas stuff crowding out Halloween candy and costumes. And tons of advertising and sale flyers during November. Finally we get to Black Friday, the go-shopping-for-one-of-three-bargains-at-a-big-box-store-at-4am the day after Thanksgiving, followed inexorably by Cyber Monday, whereupon the online stores which to make the Internet crawl and bring office productivity to negative numbers on the Monday after Thanksgiving.

Now we have... Deer Season starting this weekend before Christmas.

From the Grand Rapids Press:

"Deer season" begins Saturday, in retail speak.

That’s when the most reluctant shoppers begin venturing into stores with what Kimberly Smith calls that “deer in the headlights look,” foraging for gifts.

Okay, I Get It

I certainly understand the sentiment that not every one is a shopper or a bargain hunter, that many people (many of us? grin) put off Christmas shopping until the last minute and that it is easy to be clueless as to what to get for people. So putting on extra staff in boutique shops to add last-minute and less-than-clueful customers certainly makes sense. And I also understand all the basic economics -- retail stores depend heavily on Christmas sales to make their years and 2010 as a business year has mostly royally sucked -- so savvy retailers need to do what they can to survive. I understand, even sympathize. I worked Christmas retail at Carolina Camera Center at Friendley Shopping Center for a number of years. It's busy.

It's just that my inner Grinch is rebelling at Yet Another Cutesy Christmas Shopping Day Term. Deer Season. Get it. Funny. Once. Ha.

Can we move on, please?

Dr. Phil